OUR STORY Part 53: LESS THAN TWO WEEKS LEFT TO SAY GOODBYE

The camera was not on the right setting as I hurried over to the window, but I wanted to get a shot of the nightly routine I had discussed in an earlier blog about Duke's resident friend Raccoon.

Duke lays under the window sill every night waiting for his buddy. After the Raccoon eats some left over cat food or bread crusts he comes over and stands on his hind legs while he and Duke press noses up against the window to say hello for a bit.

His friend then takes a bath in the big water dish and goes on with his evening while Duke goes back to sleep under the window sill, sometimes only to awake up later for a return visit from the little guy.

What a sweet memory we will treasure for sometime. I hope the next owners don't pull out a 22 and shoot at any of these precious creatures.

On another note: Mike and I have been working hard to clean closets, drawers and our office; organizing what we can in preparation for the estate liquidation sale.

Mike went to bed feeling very sick last night as a result of the ongoing surmounting stresses. It resulted in his having a major headache and nausea. Amongst other things, we have  been working on the unknowns of our immediate future; gathering contact information for emergencies while on the road to our new life, wherever that may be???

We have been filling out and sending off numerous applications and resumes to multiple areas, but nothing has transpired yet. We also sent correspondence via fax and followed up with numerous phone calls to the mortgage company and their foreclosure law firm in an effort to get them to work with us on our need for a little breathing room in this transition. But our correspondence has been much to no avail. They don't care or even have consideration enough for our plight to give us the courtesy of returning Mike's voice-mails.

They like so many others bring to thought the story of the man who fell amongst thieves.

“And Jesus answering said, A certain man went down from Jerusalem to Jericho, and fell among thieves, which stripped him of his raiment, and wounded him, and departed, leaving him half dead.

And by chance there came down a certain priest that way: and when he saw him, he passed by on the other side.

 And likewise a Levite, when he was at the place, came and looked on him, and passed by on the other side.

 But a certain Samaritan, as he journeyed, came where he was: and when he saw him, he had compassion on him,

 And went to him, and bound up his wounds, pouring in oil and wine, and set him on his own beast, and brought him to an inn, and took care of him.

 And on the morrow when he departed, he took out two pence, and gave them to the host, and said unto him, Take care of him; and whatsoever thou spendest more, when I come again, I will repay thee.

 Which now of these three, thinkest thou, was neighbour unto him that fell among the thieves?

 And he said, He that shewed mercy on him. Then said Jesus unto him, Go, and do thou likewise.”

Luke 10:30-37

There is still this battle at times when we find ourselves caught in the emotional paralysis of the "deer in the headlights."  The reality that after three and a half years our case came to a screeching halt.

We were supposed to be in trial next month, October 11, 2011, against the sellers' realtors and their brokerage firm. The senator's office and our attorney had both been communicating with the foreclosure law firm and Chase Home Finance in efforts to stave off foreclosure until we had an opportunity to have our case heard before a jury. This was successful until mid July when our lives were forever changed by the decision of one local judge who literally turned our world upside down; tossing out our case along with our civil right to seek justice and financial remedy through a jury of our peers.

The recent decision still haunts us along with comments made by individuals including our own attorney; inferring that as transplants from southern California we have simply been shut down by local small town politics.

It's irrelevant at this point as we are now on the fast track to losing everything we have worked so very hard for over many, many years. I think back on those 120 hour work weeks and the lengthy business trips doing trials away from home. Then there is all of that time, effort and love that went into Mike's efforts to provide me with my first real "home" and safe haven. It's all gone now, just like that!

“As through this world I ramble
I see lots of funny men.
Some will rob you with a six-gun
And some with a fountain pen.”
-Woody Guthrie

I have these periods of peace when I am able to meditate on God's promises; but then there are those times of complete melt down when we are hard at task dealing with the reality of our circumstances; selling off all of our memories of building a life together. It just becomes so physically and emotionally overwhelming at times; and not for lack of trying to express such in this blog, but there truly is no way to articulate what it is like to go through these past four years.

Mike doesn't look well these days and I find myself still checking to make sure he's chest is moving and he is still breathing in the middle of the night. Call it dramatic, but it's the reality of our life right now.

My blood pressure has been running high and consequently my vision has been very bad, combined with episodes of seizure activity. This only adds to the numerous stress factors Mike already has on his overflow palate.

We discussed again this morning how it is ever in the forefront of both our minds that we do not want to fail God in our words or thoughts. (Hebrews 3:12) Trusting God is not an option. Oh this wretched flesh of ours. Today I shall meditate on:

Proverbs 3:5-6

King James Version (KJV)

 ⁵Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.
 ⁶In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.

Catch me Father, lest I fall!